Skip to main content

Lost

It has been a month since I have been back in Pune and I don't know how that month has passed.

It has all been internship, moot, assignments and more assignments. I have not slept for more than 4 hours in the past three weeks and today I feel enough is enough.

I frankly can't take it anymore, I need sleep, I need leisure time, I need a break, and it has just been a month, I have like 3 more left and now I feel like I can't do this any more.

I have legitimately had like actual moments where I have  wanted to leave all this and go and join like a writing school, I was even checked a couple of colleges.

But I always stop short, I don't know why?
May be I am too afraid or too complacent or I just think too much about it.

Plus on top of it I feel so incomplete these days, I feel as if I am  doing everything in such a mechanic manner, I feel as if my life has no purpose. I have no clue what would I do after this course gets over. I have never felt so lost, so completely and utterly loss.

 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Restoring back faith in humanity one person at a time.

So what I was dreading finally happened, my friend and my crush finally got together. But as it turns out it is not that bad, I don't feel resentful or sad in fact I'm quite happy.  I have realized I didn't like him at all. I was just fascinated with him and that fascination got over as soon as I talked with him for some time. He is just as boring as everyone else. And on the top of that I'm really happy for her, I never knew I was such a good friend. See she had lived in Delhi for a very long time so as to cope up with the beasts there (yes that what they deserved to be called) she got into this shell, became something she was not. But with him she feels she is returning back to her old self. And she just seems so happy, I can't just simply resent her happiness and frankly I'm not that damaged(I still have faith in humanity), in fact I'm not damaged at all. My thick skin has protected me pretty well from the activities of these beasts. I feel people are c
Post a Comment
Read more

Not a Teenager anymore

Well, I think it is about time I revamp my blog. There are a cuple of reasons for this- to begin with I am not a teenager anymore I just turned 20 so the blog desperately needs a name change. Plus I started this blog when I was really young with really no clear motive in mind . Over the past two years it has become more like my online journal, but a very ill documented one at that. I become activee on it when I feel like and leave it at the drop of the hat. My lack of commitment to this blog is something which I am really ashamed off, I know I have no readership so I slack off more and thus begins the vicious cycle. I did not start this blog for the readership but then again I don't really remember why did I ever start it in the first place. I remember I always thought ( and still do) that I was a good writer  and ws capable of producing something that the world would be inerested in reading. But, now I do realize that though I am a good  writer but there are better writers out
Post a Comment
Read more

Need for validation

I have known it for quite some time that I have a very desperate need for validation and I can't tolerate criticism, there have been times when I have stopped talking to people or have manipulated public opinion to his determinant against a person who has dared to criticize me. I know I have a fault, I know that I am not really that good of an orator but I know one thing for sure that I have this friend to whom I have referred before as. " That annoying friend" and dude I know she is dumber than I am. I know it in my heart and my brain. She is just this extremely emotional creature who as acts like a child, is extremely uncompromising and a grave attention seeker. She is really slow can't understand criticism. But that is not what I am writing to you about, what really annoys me is that the fact that she does not work hard at all, she does not even complete her syllabus, does nothing, I know for a fact that she can't write or think crap and still ends up gettin
Post a Comment
Read more